LAAANDAAAAN!! and the Big Brother 2010 Auditions.

London: (Friday 5th February - Sunday 8th February)

1 Week ago today I was packing my bags to go to London. Why? To audition for Big Brother with my friend Steph. After the 7 hour, cramped coach ride I couldn't wait to be off and stretch my legs. We traveled around London for about 30 minutes waiting to go to the coach station, and I was in awe, I was mostly in wonder it was so fascinating to see all these bright lights dazzling, bearing in mind this was half 6 on saturday morning. The sky was hardly visible, only through the cracks in what appears to be a concrete labyrinth, even in the glimpses when you got to see the sky you couldn't see the stars because of the glow of all the shops, bars, restaurants, cars and street lights. when we eventually got there we decided to head out straight to the audition process which was all the way at Wembley, we where at Victoria coach station, and neither of us had been to London before, we had no idea were to go. We asked an old man for directions, he was very friendly and informative, and pointed us in the right direction. We asked at the information desk for the tickets and a map, which we got. Off we went to using the Tube. 30 minutes later after getting off at different stations we arrived, it was 8.45, the audition process opened its doors at 8.00 am. so we wandered around Wembley for a while asking people for directions, everyone said something different to the last. We walked past a bus stop and seen the bus pulling in, we asked the guy for directions he said he goes near it and would give us directions for when we got off, which he did, but he charged us 2 quid for 2 stop journey, what a rip! but eventually we got there safe and sound and with a clue of going back. In the queue we got our photographs taken for a newspaper as well as a brief interview for RADIO 1!! We loved it, too much. after spending 7 hours waiting around we made some friends, who were also auditioning they were from manchester and had already auditioned before in Glasgow. It helped pass the time by alot.

The Audition Process -
firstly when we eventually got to the front row we were separated into Male and Female lines, then 5 girls and 5 guys would be picked to form a group of 10, they would go head to head against another group of 10. you where asked to do tasks such as pass the ball over and under or from neck to neck as well as other mini-tasks such as an "electric wave". the loosing team had to do a forfeit chosen by the winning team, when we first joined our team was made to do the "Funky Chicken" and sing twinkle twinkle little star, Not really a good forfeit i know. when we won the next one we made the opposing team pretend they where climaxing and had to show how turned on they were getting through noises and actions. We got them good! After we had done them mini-tasks and forfeits for about 15 minutes we went over to part 2 which was led by a different instructor to the one we had in part 1. He asked us to go into pairs and find 2 interesting facts about each other and report them back to the group. My interesting facts were 1. I do an amazing drag impersonation of Susan Boyle 2. I'm a shock artist (or soon to be anyways). after we reported back to the group we were asked to place ourselves into order of who would be evicted first all the way through to who would win, as a group we couldn't decide, so the guy asked this 40 year old woman to take control, she put me third place, which I was happy with. After that was done, he asked us to make a famous landmark or structure using ourselves, the 40 year old woman was like pyramids and everyone agreed, wait one second, 10 people are going to make a triangular based pyramid, idiots, to be fair to them. It failed, Tremendously. The guy turned around and said it was shit, basically. After disassembling the pyramid we stood in a line, he then told us who ever gets a stamp can move on too round 2, I didn't get a stamp or either did this other guy i got talking to and believe me he was a crease! they chose - 1. Someone who didn't talk, he just looked like Lemar. WOW, we want to watch TV to see someone who looks like Lemar and doesnt talk. NEXT. 2. some 40 year old slag who said she has 2 kids and goes out every weekend on the piss to pull random men. Interesting. We all know a SLUT, so NEXT please. 3. a 30 year old woman who could hardly speak a word of english, her interesting fact was I LIKE SHOOPPPENG!!! he said to her thats not really interesting, she went I DRINK LOTS AND WAKE UP NAKED NOT REMEMBERING A THING, and the biased guy nodded and went Nice. Loser. NEXT. 4. that 40 year old woman went through who took control, she obviously stood out because she was the one who was given the power, she was OK, nothing Special. Judging on the people they put through it was a very biased process, the male leader picking 3 girls and 1 guy, also the people where B-O-R-I-N-G-! Yawn. Seriously if the standard is like that for the last year I might not even watch it. I would of made an amazing housemate because I get on extremely well with people, If I don't like someone I make it VERY clear. Also I'm an artist I like to provoke, Prod and Annoy the living shit out of people, I always keep myself entertained. They lost out. BIG TIME. Even though I've had quite a negative rant, it wasn't because I didn't get in, it was because of the quality of people who went in where shit, and usually I enjoy watching Big Brother. I enjoyed the experience, but some people can't take a hint they are not going to get in.

After the long audition process I was fucked, I had no sleep for 36 hours and I was draaaained. we didn't get to our hotel room until half 5, I had 3 hours sleep and woke up feeling terrible, I felt sick from the lack of sleep I had. But steph persuaded me to go out and I got a shower and ready and i felt alot better but still not 100%, I was actually quite dreading going out incase i felt worse and up until that point I wasn't enjoying London as much as I hoped. We got the Tube to Oxford Circus and WOW, I came to life, to see the 4 story told shops of everything from H&M to Apple Store, I was amazed and in love with London, We walked for an hour and a half, but I didn't care i felt alot better, I was buzzing off magical window displays and bright city lights. We eventually ended up in Soho after walking around aimlessly, It was amazing, the Rock and Gay scene, we walked past G-A-Y unfortunately it was closing at the mere time of half 11, we wandered for a bit more and ended up at this bar called edge and only being 4 pound to get in and a FREE drink, I was ecstatic being one of the more cheaper bars in London. It was fantastic, It played Pop music all night, from the likes of Lady GaGa to Michael Jackson and as a bonus the DJ was a drag queen! (I will upload the photos as soon as i get them developed!) It was a great night and i thoroughly enjoyed myself even though it was £3.80 for half a pint of cider!! On the sunday I went shopping at Oxford Circus after being mesmerized by it all, and Holy Shit. if I had to pick what my favorite high street shop would be H&M, I looked in there first. WOW. so much variety so many things, I was in Love, I wish I had money. I hate money. Then to my shock i thought since I'm here I'll have a look around Topman, and fuck me! It was HEAVEN! seriously I thought I died! I would live there if I had the chance It was, WOW, i was lost for words! So many nice clothes, so many nice shoes, so many nice accessories. Heaven. I now have a new favorite after seeing the 2 floored clothing marvel. I'm still in love with it now, and can't wait for my next trip to London, I think the whole groups wanting to go, Its amazing, It's definitely an experience and I'm so excited. Even more so its helped me figure out that I defiantly want to go to university there just for the culture. I'm in love with London. -BL


Me and Steph Auditioning for Big Brother 11: http://www.anorak.co.uk/238592/celebrities/big-brother-11-wembley-auditions-in-pictures.html?pid=9837

Neon guy who should of went through, he was in my group (also you can see me and steph lurking in the background, haha): http://www.anorak.co.uk/238592/celebrities/big-brother-11-wembley-auditions-in-pictures.html?pid=9838

PS. Sorry I haven't been updating my blog with art work, I've been busy and alot of things have been going on in my personal life recently. I hope to be regularly updating my blog again on Monday 15th February. Thanks guys. -BL